so much. so much bad luck has come my way this year. I managed to get kicked out of my house twice and on top of that my mom found out i smoke weed and probably now thinks i’m a slut. How i manged to do that in 4 months is still confusing to myself.

Everything is fucked up, in its own way. I’m fucked up in my own way. I push the good away from me and embrace the negative.

No wonder I’m not happy. I haven’t been happy, genuinely happy, in a long time. No matter how many times i tell myself, no matter how much i drink…I’m not happy.

And it sucks. It’s my own fault though. I have no one else to blame but myself. I brought this lonely feeling among myself because of the way i am. the way i think. and the way i push positive things away.

it’s as if i like to be sad. or feel alone. in a fucked up way i like it. it’s a feeling I’ve grown to except and i can’t tell you if that’s a good thing or a bad thing

neoputa:

i have unlimited texting and i only text 3 people ever i think my phone company looks at my bill and just laughs

(via chrisinizmm)